Is That Hummus? Shit Girls Say, Part 2

She's BAAACK! I've watched the latest installment of Shit Girls Say at least 8 times. Love it. Love it. Love it. The only thing unrealistic about part deux (aside from the whole drag thing), is that a girl doesn't need to ask, "Is that hummus?" Of course it is. We can spot hummus from a mile away.

These are some of the lines from the video "girls" most definitely say and what they really mean:

Hey, where are you? 
Hurry your ass up. I'm early, feeling socially awkward and need to look busy using my phone.

Do you want to split a cookie? 
Are we doing carbs this weekend?

How long have you guys been open? 
I hope this small talk leads to something free.  

Is this my water? 
Even though you're my BFF, I'm kinda grossed out by your cold. xo

That's not okay. 
No need for translation.

So, good. Right? 
This is really all I can say while shoving my face. But we're totes on the same page.

Get these chips away from me. 
Really, get these chips away from me. I haven't had a full fat chip since '92. 

That poor dog needs waterrrrr...
Aww, pets are cute. I'm so glad I don't have one.

I love wine. 
I can't feel my face anymore. You're my best friend.

I'm just like...hmpphhhh. 
I'm making a point without actually saying anything at all.

(Here's my blog post on the first ep of Shit Girls Say in case you missed it.)