A Very "Controversial" Bachelor

The best part of watching the trainwreck known as The Bachelor, is the play-by-play from friends as we watch. And last night's episode provided really good material for my viewing crew.We had some very strong reactions to Brad dangling in a harness, while wearing Spandex, practicing for the Elvis themed version of Cirque du Soleil. We were a little peeved that B-Rad is still under Crazy Michelle's spell. And we were annoyed that no one feels "special". Hi, you're on a reality show and you sleep in child sized bunk beds, 4 to a room. What did you expect?

Here's a little banter from our viewing party. Do you agree?

Immediately upon the start of the show:
-I hope Michelle falls out of a vehicle.

1st Brad testimonial:
-Is he wearing a felt vest?

Shawntel returns from shopping spree date. Potential bubble over Ashley's head:
-F*ck the circus, I want a Fendi.

Alone date with Shawntel, on the roof:
-Is this The Hangover?
-I love fireworks.
-Fireworks are the best.

Group chat on the couches, Michelle says something that sent chills through our spines:
-Michelle is so pretty. She uses it for evil.

Nascar Date, Michelle saunters by:
-Wouldn't want to be on a track with her crazy ass...

Brad to crying brown haired girl from Columbus who says she doesn't feel special:
-"I don't want you to be crying." Secretly thinking, "Wait, what's your name, brown haired girl? And more importantly, what do you think of my pectoral muscles?"

In reference to Lisa, who Brad has yet to speak to:
-She's a sweet girl, that Lisa.

Chantal acting crazy/insecure:
-Seriously, Chantal. Shut your mouth.

2 on 1 date with the Ashleys:
-I think both of those dresses are from Jessica McClintock.

Girl talk scene:
-What's going on here?
-Oh, it's just the Chantals, on the bed, talking about the Ashleys...

Nanny Ashley gets sent home, random pony-tailed dude there to take her bags:
-Where'd they find the luggage handler?
-He's going to be the next bachelor!

General consensus prior to rose ceremony:
-The one with the severe front sweep needs to go.(And ultimately she did ... in a cab. No limo??)

Almost end of show:
-I can't believe this is two hours.
-It's excessive.
-I love it.

Rose ceremony:
-Britt looks Mormon.
-With stripper shoes.
-She should be on Big Love.
-She could eat a donut too. Wouldn't kill her.

Scenes from next week reveal that this is the most CONTROVERSIAL season EVER. Chris Harrison, we hope you're getting a raise.